Southern Brisbane Nerf Club

Wednesday, 11 November 2015

Nerf if no Rival for Aussie toy safety laws.

It's been almost a month since I've posted. Sorry about that. But this new info that I've been made aware of has me seeing red, actually, it would actually prevent me from seeing red. More after jump.

Friend of mine Ben Archbold decided to share this bit of news with me from, Australia will not be getting Nerf Rival blasters.



Our toy safety laws won't permit the sale of Rival blasters because their too powerful? Blue trigger Dart Tag stuff were more powerful than Elite and we still got those. But our nanny state toy laws are saying we can't have them because a kid might buy one from a shop and shoot their eye. You can also buy cricket bats from shops too, I'm pretty sure those will do more damage to someone's head than a ball made from foam.

"Buuuuut Rob... you're not meant to hit people with cricket bats, but you are meant to hit people with those foam balls."

Ok then, Frisbee. You're meant to throw those at someone else. Ever been hit in the head by one of those? I fuggin hurts. And Zing Bows. I've seen those for sale here and I'm willing to bet they'll fly faster and further than a Nerf ball. They'll hit harder too. Oh, water bombs/balloons. Ever been hit in the kidneys by one of those? OUCH! And, AND, you're meant to throw those at people. Foam swords, you and a mate have one each, what's the first thing you're gonna do with them? Try to hit each other with them. And you can get those things anywhere.

But OOOOOOHHHHHH NNNNOOOOO, A tiny dimpled foam testicle is TOO DAMN DANGEROUS TO BE SOLD BECAUSE IT MIGHT HURT SOMEONE! Ever trod on a Lego brick? Ever felt the pain of having your foot partially impaled by a small plastic construction medium? Everyone has. It hurts LIKE HELL! And Lego is fuggin everywhere!

Darts. I love a good game of darts, who doesn't? How easily available are those weighted pointy metal bastards? Very, is the answer. They're even designed to fly straight too and you can get them from any sports store... ANY.

So, in-spite of all the far more dangerous toys available, why no Rivals? Why not sell it as sports equipment? Hasbro... did you even try? Did you even try to sell Rivals here or did you throw it into the 'too hard basket' on top of the Rampage's blast shield and the Stampede's 50 dart drum

Did Hasbro back down from toy safety laws like a kid backing down from his mum who denied his request for a chocolate bar?

Now look, I'm all for laws that make sense. Anti smoking laws, good, they're not harsh enough I reckon. Firearms, good, gun control is a good thing and it works. But this, this 'no Australia, you can't shoot balls' thing is just silly and makes no sense what so ever. All it's going to do is force those who want Rivals to purchase from overseas, pumping more of our money into some other country's economy.

Now I'm tired, pissed off and thirsty... I'm going to bed.


~ Rob


  1. As one from the US, I have to say i really feel sorry for you guys. I mean come on a little foam ball hitting someone will not permanently injure them as long as they are wearing eye pro!

  2. no rivals? nothing will ever quench the hatred in my heart for this

  3. Hmm, is there any law against you Aussies donating to some website or another and receiving these as a gift?

    1. Plus, donations are non-taxable. Unfortunately, there'd still be international shipping.
      Perhaps if you rounded up a bunch of people who wanted Rival blasters, donated en masse to an organization in America.
      Since you'll have already asked for what everybody wanted, you'd be able to send an email to somebody in the organization telling what the order should entail.
      Next, people from that organization go out and buy the Rival blasters.
      After that, the blasters are unpacked and bulk-packed into innocuous-looking packages, and mailed to Australia.

      Your guys would have to pay a bit more than we would in order to account for shipping, but you guys would be able to start balling!

  4. well its official Australia has got soft "breaking news kids jailed for being active and having fun outdoors" like seriously we need to stop putting on our bullet proof vests and take a step outside and live a little

  5. Well im not suprised australians are paranoid about it, i mean with all the nature trying to kill them either way *cough* emus *cough*


  6. As a fellow nerfer who now resides in oz. I think it would be best if we get to see acrual written and clear legislation as to why we cant have these blasters. i know ages ago i asked on the forum if there is a legislation book that can be purchased to clearly see what can and cannot be brought here and a written conscise reason why it cannot be sold or why we have memasculated nerf blasters?? It is about time these document (like the foil test) be made available to the public so we can make an educated choices of our own.

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